Dead Drunk: Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse... One Beer at a Time by Richard Johnson

Dead Drunk: Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse... One Beer at a Time by Richard Johnson

Author:Richard Johnson [Johnson, Richard]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Chicago Moonlight Publishing
Published: 2013-04-02T22:00:00+00:00


Chapter 21

Sausage-Fest

Big Rob pinned the deadish, snarling beast down and rubbed its face into the gravel. “He doesn’t like Left-Nut.”

“It’s a good thing that I pulled Cliff’s teeth or he would’ve gobbled his last nut down like a chicken nugget,” Trent added and pointed his pistol at the back of the thing’s head. “But this fuckstick’s done for. We can’t have Left-Nut shitting his pants every week. Even I think that’s messed up.”

Mike intervened. “Hold off. We’re learning too much from him.”

“Like what, that he wants to eat us? Sorry, but that’s pretty much Zombie 101, and I don’t think we need to keep Cliff around for that type of brilliant insight,” Trent replied.

“He’s dropping weight.”

“So? We’re all starving,” Bruce said and chuckled, still buzzing from the weed.

“Watch.” Mike grabbed a chunk of cat food from an opened can and dropped it under Cliff’s slobbering mouth. The zombie completely ignored it.

Trent shrugged. “I don’t want to eat that crap either.”

“This shows they only want human flesh, and there’s not much of that left in the city,” Mike said. “If he starves to death, we’ll know how long the others can last without food.”

“That’s all fine and good, except we’re gonna starve right along with them,” Blake said. “Our stash might last a few more weeks, then what?”

“Then we get more,” Mike replied.

Trent holstered his gun. “Okay, so the shit-bag gets a reprieve. Now what are you gonna do with him?”

Mike walked to the side of the roof facing the fenced-in alleyway and pointed downwards. Seconds later, Cliff bounced off of the garbage cans and then rose, seemingly unscathed by the thirty-foot drop.

Russ peered over the edge. “That dude’s like a cockroach.”

Mike rubbed imaginary dirt from his hands. “Problem solved. Now we can safely study him.”

Left-Nut was having none of it. “This is bullshit. That’s the second time he tried to eat me.”

“It is bullshit,” Charlie said while holding back a smile. “He should’ve gotten you the first time.”

The excitement over and the group completely out of weed, everyone turned in for another sleepless night. Meanwhile, unaware of his freshly shattered ankle and broken nose, Cliff stared aimlessly at the alley gate like a dog waiting to go outside.



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